Whether or not to give your baby a dummy is a controversial topic among parents. Some parents feel it's an essential tool; others think it's an unnecessary vice. Elizabeth Gasson explains why she gave her son a dummy, and looks at the pros and cons of using one.
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"If you give that baby a pacifier, you'll ruin his teeth!"
"Don't give her a dummy - it will be so hard to break the habit."
"Get that binkie out of his mouth!"
Dummies get so much negative press, new parents who want to use them must feel a bit like they're doing something illicit. Often, the use of a dummy is accompanied by a shamefaced and apologetic, "Oh, I know it's not good for her, but it's the only thing that will keep her happy!" as the offending parent surreptitiously maneuvers said dummy into their child's mouth and holds it there until the relieved baby starts merrily sucking away. Dummy-using parents face negative criticism, dirty looks, and disapproving "Tsk, tsk" noises from friends and strangers alike. And the older your child is, the more other people feel it's their right to condemn.
As new parents, my husband and I made a choice to give our baby a dummy when he was only a few weeks old. Our decision may have had something to do with the fact that our baby was premature, and the neonatal staff suggested that we use one, as it would help to develop his sucking reflexes for nursing. Now that Johnathan is a year old, I'm pleased we decided to use a dummy. I have seen the benefits of it firsthand: It's an automatic soother, especially at night, and he's a much stronger feeder. But I haven't been immune to society's judgemental attitude toward the great dummy dilemma.
Whether or not to use a dummy has been a controversial subject for a long time. It seems that you either agree with using one or you don't agree at all - there is no middle ground. When I have taken my little one to play groups, I have been subjected to more than one disapproving glare from other mothers when my son comes in sucking on a dummy. I have even had a few direct comments about the negatives of using one - dependency seems to be the most common reason people give. But as I heard someone say on a popular talk show recently, "Have you ever seen a 40-year-old man sucking on a binkie?"
I have to admit that I am slightly worried about what I am going to do in order to "break" my son's dependency on his dummy when the time comes. I have read a few books and have asked a few parents, but the information all seems to be the same. It looks like we have two choices: We can go cold turkey, or let him give up the dummy himself when he's ready.
Some cultures are more accepting of the use of a dummy than others. According to an article published in 2006 in Pediatrics magazine, "The use of pacifiers varies considerably between countries and also within countries. In New Zealand, the prevalence of pacifier use was low (10.4%), but within the country varied from 3.6% in the southern South Island to 32.3% in the northern North Island. In other countries, much higher pacifier use has been reported. In European countries, pacifier use varies between 36% and 71%. There is little information as to the reasons for such wide variation between countries and why pacifiers are introduced. Turkish and Moroccan people dislike thumb-sucking and they actively try to prevent this by offering the breast and/or a pacifier."
Why might a dummy be a good thing?
Recent research from the American Paediatric Association and Kaiser Permanent has shown that the giving babies, especially ones who are more prone to SIDS, a pacifier has drastically reduced the rate of SIDS by up to 90%. Researchers believe that it is due to the child's sucking reflexes while using the dummy, which may help to rouse the child from a possibly deadly deep sleep.
Dummies may also help to provide "increased protection from an unfavourable sleeping environment"; that is, sleeping on the child's face or side.
Dummies also are a great way of making sure no nasty objects are accidentally put into baby's mouth. However, it's important to always watch your baby, as dummies are not a fail-safe method for preventing choking.
It is said to be easier to break the habit of using a dummy than it is to stop thumb-sucking. And dummies are also generally cleaner than thumbs - and if they get grubby, you can always sterilise them!
Why you should think twice
If your baby becomes dependent on the dummy, especially at night to sleep, you might have a few waking cries in the night when the baby has "lost" the dummy. It is not recommended to use dummy clips when sleeping, especially if they are long enough for the cord to become wrapped around baby's neck.
The Mayo Health Clinic has stated that using a dummy may increase the risk of middle-ear infections in young babies. However, rates of middle-ear infections are generally low in the first zero to six months of life, when the risk of SIDS is the highest. This is also the time when your baby may be most interested in the dummy.
Although there is controversial research about this point, the Mayo Health Clinic suggests that very early use of the dummy may interfere with establishing breastfeeding, as the texture of the dummy is different than the breast or bottle.
Some research has suggested that the prolonged use of a dummy may delay speech. However, there does not seem to be strong evidence for this. As for dental problems, again, the Mayo Health Clinic and the American Paediatric Association have stated that using a dummy in the first few years of life does not cause long-term dental problems. However, long term, persistent use (as with thumb-sucking) can cause the top front teeth to become slanted out or the jaw to become misaligned.
The decision to use a dummy is a personal one, and whether or not you choose to use one will depend on your family's circumstances. And if you do choose the dummy, rest assured your child is unlikely to be still sucking it when he's 40.
The history of the dummy
Dummies first appeared on the scene in around 1800, patented in the US as a "baby comforter". The design was similar to modern dummies, with a rubber teat, a shield, and a handle. Unfortunately, they quickly earned a reputation as something that the "lower classes" would use, and were associated with poor hygiene. The practice of picking up a dropped dummy from the floor and rubbing it on your shirt before popping it back into baby's mouth is not solely the preserve of contemporary parents - an article published in the British Journal of Nursing in 1915 featured a complaint by a doctor bemoaning the "dummy teat" which, "If it falls on the floor, it is rubbed momentarily on the mother's blouse or apron, lipped by the mother and replaced in the baby's mouth."
Elizabeth Gasson is Mum to one boy.
Our babies are born with an innate need to suck. It is totally natural and for many newborns
sucking on a dummy is a godsend!
Non-nutritive sucking (this means sucking while not consuming milk) has a real calming and soothing effect on our newborns. It actually helps relieve discomfort and pain as well as producing saliva which has helpful digestive enzymes to make your little one pass wind more easily and keep them comfortable. The downward pressure of the dummy on your babies tongue can also help release burps.
One tip is if you are struggling to burp your baby, try holding a dummy in as you burp them – it can often relax them helping them release gas more easily.
One of my babies was particularly ‘sucky’, he was my reflux baby and the dummy (and often a clean finger) really did help me stop feeding him constantly which contributed to his wind and digestive discomfit. If I didn’t have the dummy for him, he’d need to suck on the breast nonstop and then we were in a really vicious cycle with him drinking too much and being in pain. We know our little one’s struggle to relax and settle when they are uncomfortable.
Sucking is also one of the 5 S’s that I teach when it comes to newborn sleep. Dr Harvey Karp’s forth trimester research finds sucking stimulates the calming reflex for our babies. Dummies are also proven to lower the risk of SIDS. So there are some awesome reasons to use a dummy! However, there is a BUT and another side to things where dummy usage does impact negatively on sleep. I love dummies prior to 4 months but from there on in they can become problematic and this is when I recommend we ditch the dummy.
But why?! My babies settles to sleep and loves the dummy so why should I remove it?! Obviously this is a personal choice, but I’ll give you my reason for removing the dummy. Around 4 months is when your babies sleep cycles mature and become defined. Every time they have a naturally occurring wake through the night (around 2-4 hourly) if they have gone to sleep sucking on the dummy and stir through a sleep cycle, they will likely wake up and realise its not in their mouth and they don’t know how to resettle! So they’ll cry out needing you to replace it in order to resettle again. This means ‘dummy runs’ through the night when they stir. Whilst 1 or 2 pop ins overnight may not be a big deal initially, they don’t have the developmental skills to be able to pop the dummy in themselves until around 7-8 months of age and need us to do it. One wakeup may turn into them waking every 2 hours which is a natural sleep cycle for them and we are far better to teach them resettling skills without relying on the dummy. The dummy ends up becoming not just a calming tool but the only
way that your little one can fall asleep tool!
It can become really exhausting for everyone and I know first hand how hard this trap is! Which is way I encourage parents to ditch the dummy around 4 months and work on teaching your little one how to self settle.
If you need a couple more reasons on why to ditch the dummy (like the 2 hourly replacing through the night isn’t enough of an incentive…nudge nudge) then there is also the fact that dummies are hard to keep clean and harbour loads of germs! Not to mention there is research out there that links dummy usage with recurrent middle ear infections – ouch! In fact our toddlers dentist recommends limiting dummy usage by age 2 as the sucking can lead to problems with speech and chewing!
If, however, your little one is already over 7-8 months and very attached to their dummy, you may choose to teach them to find and replace the dummy themselves so that you don’t have to do it for them throughout the night. I recommend using a Sleepytot or a Gobstopperz soothing accessory.
You can use my discount code JUSTLOVESLEEP15 at www.gobstopperz.co.nz or justlovesleep10 at www.sleepytot.co.nz. This makes finding the dummy much easier for your little one.
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To teach your little one how to find and replace I suggest the following:
Step 1:
When your baby wants their dummy, start with putting the cuddly in their hand and gently guide it to their mouth. Do this whenever they want the dummy during the day. At night, when you do a check-in, put the dummy back in their hand instead of straight into their mouth. Do this for a few nights, or until they start putting the dummy in their mouth without your help. Make a big deal whenever they master this by themselves. Celebrate with lots of praise! It's a good idea to practice this during the day time too.
Step 2:
Next, put their cuddly next to them instead of in their hand. During the day, encourage them to pick it up from next to them rather than putting it in their hand. You can guide their hand to the comforter if necessary. Now at night, only put the comforter next to them and pat the cot mattress to encourage them to find it. Make a big deal when they do it themselves.
I know ditching the dummy can be a daunting prospect. Truly… the thought of 2 babies screaming and no way to plug them when out and about really made my knees shake with my twins. But I knew they didn’t have the skills to put them back in themselves and I would watch them stir through those sleep cycles and sure enough when we taught them resettling skills, they would pass through sleep cycles with ease, as opposed to getting distressed because they couldn’t find their dummies! Not to mention how frustrating it was tip toeing in their room and crawling under the cot trying to find the glow in the dark dummy we got ‘suckered’ (excuse the pun) into buying which wasn’t so glowing when I needed it to be!
If you’re struggling with your little one’s sleep and want help resolving dummy struggles, check out my packages here.
Is it better to use a dummy or ditch it?
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Use it
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Ditch it
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Do what works for you!
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